Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Family Romance

For an assignment in French class, my daughter had to describe her family. According to my daughter, the teacher said you could invent a family. So, my daughter, who is obsessed with "30 Rock" -- (and, yes, that is probably not good for a ten year old, even less for her 8 year old brother. How did it happen? I am not sure. One day, they were watching such inappropriate shows as "The Simpsons" and kid shows like "Phineas and Ferb" or "iCarly," and the next they were laughing at Jenna's affair with a man who plays her as a drag queen, or the man Liz meets who seems perfect but turns out to be into plushies. Along the way, they added "Suburgatory" -- which my daughter uses as a template for everything she can roll her eyes at -- and "Modern Family." I swear I am not pushing this stuff. I don't want my kids to be hip, or too grown up. I'd be okay if they wanted to watch "Spongebob Squarepants." But the boundaries keep shifting. My daughter drives the engine, and my son follows. She wants to be sophisticated. She wants cultural references. Even when she was little, she watched slightly weird out of-her-bracket stuff, like "The Monkees" and "Star Trek." ) -- well, anyway, when asked to create a family, she created hers out of the characters from "30 Rock." Her mom, Liz Lemon; her dad, Pete; Kenneth as her brother; and Alec Baldwin's Jack Donaghy as her grandpa.

I accept a good family romance. Kids are supposed to want to find out that they are orphans and that their real parents are richer, prettier, better than their real ones (I actually discussed this with my son the other day because he was having his own more traditional wish that daddy and I would turn out to be phonies). But how bad are we that she replaces us with such messed up characters? Or does she want us to be more messed up? Heaven forbid.

I'd love to say I am nothing like Liz Lemon but the appeal of that character is that every nerd girl who had trouble finding dates, didn't know how to wear eye shadow, and didn't like most guys she met finds herself in Liz. Maybe my daughter is finding herself, too.


    Why American men should boycott American women

    Boycott American Women

    I am an American man, and I have decided to boycott American women. In a nutshell, American women are the most likely to cheat on you, to divorce you, to get fat, to steal half of your money in the divorce courts, don't know how to cook or clean, don't want to have children, etc. Therefore, what intelligent man would want to get involved with American women?

    American women are generally immature, selfish, extremely arrogant and self-centered, mentally unstable, irresponsible, and highly unchaste. The behavior of most American women is utterly disgusting, to say the least.

    This blog is my attempt to explain why I feel American women are inferior to foreign women (non-American women), and why American men should boycott American women, and date/marry only foreign (non-American) women.

    Tens of millions of American men have had their lives completely destroyed by American women through the following crimes:

    1. False rape accusations (it has been proven that up to 80 percent of rape accusations are FALSE)

    2. False DV charges (same as above)

    3. Financial RAPE of men in divorce courts

    4. Emotional destruction of men by ex-wives who have stolen their children from them and forbidden contact

    5. Divorced dads who commit suicide as a result

    Not one single American woman has EVER condemned their fellow American women for committing these crimes against men. Silence means consent. Therefore, American women support and enjoy destroying men's lives and causing men to commit suicide. Therefore, is it any surprise that a huge percent of American men no longer want anything to do with American women, other than using them for easy sex and then throwing them away?

    Over 50 percent of American women are single, without a boyfriend or husband; so the fact is most American men no longer want to marry American women. Let these worthless American women grow old living alone with their 10 cats.


    BRAND NEW: Buy the Boycott American Women book. After reading this book, I promise you that you will never even think about dating an American woman ever again, or else I will give you your money back. That’s right, if you are not convinced by my book, I will give you a full refund!

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    John Rambo

  2. Wow, who knew a blog about Tina Fey could inspire such vitriol. Sorry, ladies, he is off the market!

  3. Is his name really John Rambo or did he borrow it? What a creep!!!
    Steve Elworth